138 days or 4 months 16 days until my 4th decade starts. However you want to look at it, it's on it's way. To me birthdays are a personal New Year, I want to start this one off being in a healthier state than I am in now. This weight gain has dealt me a negative blow mentally & physically.
I really want to make changes to my life to live healthier. I need to learn how to stop myself when I am making poor nutritional decisions. Why do I make them? Mostly, it's convenience. Or the fact that chocolate tastes better than everything so why not eat it?! I need to actually make the time to have healthy prepared food on hand. I say it's gonna happen every week and something else always comes up.
I have to find balance so that when life throws me zingers I don't lose myself in the shuffle. I haven't been successful at that the past 2 months, in fact I failed terribly. I need to learn about "putting my needs first" which leads back to finding balance. I need time to exercise and to shop for & prepare food. Real people do it, I read their blogs. It's not just mumbo jumbo found in self help books.
I ask myself if other people can succeed at this why can't I? Have you ever asked yourself this question?
I did have a "moment of balance" last night after work, I got the laundry going and walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes. My feet and calves didn't want any part of it but I kept on walking, slowly like 3.0! I hate that, that pace is what I can handle right now, but it is and I have to accept it.
I plan on walking again tonight. I need to get back to food logging even if it's just really laid back. Like just writing it all down (old school in a notebook) and not obsessing over calories/carb/fat online. Just watch for a week or so and then figure out if I'm gonna go back to tracking on Sparkpeople.
I got a reminder email for the Bayhead 5k it's 11 weeks away on May 18, 2013. The Color Run sent out an email saying registration is open, the race is on August 31, 2013 it's 26 weeks away. These are 5k's I had my sights set on in the beginning of the year when I bought my treadmill. I'm so far behind on the C25K training schedule I probably wouldn't be able to run the Bayhead 5k in May, I'd end up walking it. I have time to train for the Color Run, but I wonder how bad or annoying the whole color powder throwing thing can be. They make it sound like it's fun but it might not be. I'm not in a good place to decide today, I'll think about it more on the weekend.
